Well, just like, Star Wars, Lethal Weapon, geez, even Planet of the Apes, some fool had to come along and write a sequel to the original story. This blog is alas joining that hall of fame.
My original blog, Mister IVF, opens with two infertility clueless Australians in their late 30’s battling through the rollercoaster thrills and spills of infertility and specifically IVF, and really specifically, 5 cycles of it. It stars the generally unflappable Mrs IVF (aka the Mango Princess) with in her gorgeous looks and cool Queensland disposition to life (Americans read “Queensland” as “Florida”; Poms read as, oh shit, Bournemouth? No, think south Spain somewhere), and Mrs IVF’s co-pilot in this adventure is the rather deep thinking yet somewhat over thinking, black humoured (yes, it has a “u” in it) and spermally retarded Mr IVF, (aka yours truly).
The story ended up with Mrs IVF finding out she is pregnant on our 3rd wedding anniversary and us now hopefully joining the ranks of 30 million other hand made people on this planet.
Here’s the link if you want to catchup on the story to date: http://misterivf.wordpress.com/
A few pointers about this blog:
* I vowed at the pregnancy post on the Mister IVF blog that that I was hanging up my Lisdexic typing fingers and ending my blogging career. I have clearly not stuck to that rule and here’s why:
(1) I miss it, but I can’t post back there anymore. I don’t belong. As things stand, I am out of the IVF land and maybe it’s just me, but I am in a different place. I used to hunt for IVF blogs written by guys to see how others were going through all this crap and just kept coming up with well not much, but when I did find a blog it generally had children and pregnancy stories and finding the “stage I was at” was a struggle. So the Mister IVF site stays as is as effort to give people hope that can get out of the IVF bunker when you have male and female infertility issues and ends there.
(2) there is a story to be told about people coming (successfully?)out of IVF. We, alas, are still really not normal. Well, I don’t feel it, (but am not complaining!). I read a survey recently that IVF parents have all sorts of unique traits. They get off breast feeding sooner – don’t trust it – and all sorts of other weird things. Who knows if this is true, but it’s not quite 100% normal.I still freak out a bit with envy when I see a pregnant woman, then I catch up with myself and give myself a good slap in the head. This is why for the last 4-6 weeks I have been pondering whether I set this “sequel” blog up and if so what to call it. I think the name I landed on sums it up. I am in a sort of no mans land that you only get to after IVF land and you know what, its just really different, but not normal. I don’t really understand it yet. Pregnant friends treat us as part of a new club, but it’s still like I am wearing a dinner suit to a toga party that I have wanted to get invited to for 3 years. Said another way, its like coming out of a very dark cave after 3 years into a beautiful sunny day. I think I am just blinded by it all.
(3) Ok, I confess, and bear with me on this, I am struggling a bit to get my head around all of this pregnancy. Should I be high fiving everyone I see, I guess, and am I ecstatic, you bet, BUT am I still probably waiting for the world most monumental blow up and we go back, way back the the start? Well, I guess, sadly, my head is still a bit on that wavelength. I am thinking if all goes well, you will see me get over this, but for now, I’m not yet there. Let me be super clear, to those who I left behind in IVF world, I cannot complain, and I am not, every day here is a day better than there, we all know it, I just need to work through it. For those of you who have studied a bit of psychology, the conditioned is called Conditioned Response and the guy who worked this out was a Russian guy called Pavlov and a dog, Buster (or probably Busterski – ok – I don’t really know the dog’s name). In a nuts shell when a scientist came into a room and fed the dog, the dog would salivate. After a while the dog worked out that when he saw a scientist, he was about to be fed and salivated in anticipation. (Here’s a link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_conditioning). I guess I am just saying that after 5 cycles of IVF, (which are all pretty much the same process by and large), I am “sailvating” waiting for the conditioned response, i.e. a failed cycle. Its time for this scientist to NOT feel me! Geez – that’s all a bit heavy for an “about” page
(4) I write to give those who need it a bit of hope, (boy, that came out cheesier that I meant it). There is a way out of IVF. It does happen. Mrs IVF and I are veterans of 5 cycles with all sorts of fucked up issues and fingers crossed, it will not blow up on us from here. We didn’t fluke the 1 cycle (bless the people who get that in hindsight!), but we took the longer path to get out of IVFland, so, we were not as long as some others for sure (and there are some real hero stories out there for what people commit to and achieve), but we’ve had a fair go and fingers crossed, it fucking worked.
….these pages will more that likely cover things that IVFland residents will find tough to read on a bad day, or maybe any day. I have seen other before me do this and to be honest, had days I couldn’t stomach it. In fact anything to do with these pages will sit weird with IVF’ers, but we are all different, have different dispositions and different motivations, so for those of you who came over from my old blog to this one, it’s great to have you along. For those of you who are new to my mind, welcome, please enjoy your stay and remember, your nearest exit may be behind you. Bing. Cabin crew, prepare for landing.